Harmony is fourth on my list of five strengths from CliftonStrengths.
I don’t think I agree with it.
Not because I don’t prefer things to feel… settled.
I do.
But I don’t think I actively try to make that happen.
When something feels off, I notice it.
My instinct isn’t to step in and fix it—
it’s more like…
this shouldn’t be like this.
And then I’m in it,
a little awkward,
a little unsure what to do with it,
just knowing it needs to go away.
Most of the time, I try to move past it.
I’ll brush it off if I can.
Change the subject.
Or I’ll offer something—
a thought—
and then follow it with
“but you can do whatever you want.”
Just to make sure it doesn’t land like I’m pushing anything.
I’m not trying to mediate.
I don’t step in and help people work it out.
I’m usually just trying to keep it from dragging on.
In those moments, I’m not thinking about agreement.
I’m thinking:
don’t make this worse…
let’s move past it…
we don’t need to stay here.
But there are moments where I don’t do that.
When things feel heightened.
When no one is really in agreement.
When I can tell it’s going to matter later—
or I’ll replay it if it stays unresolved.
That’s when I step in.
Not to take over—
just to bring it down a level.
At the very least, make it less tense.
At most… get enough alignment that it doesn’t linger.
And that’s the part that doesn’t quite match how Harmony is described.
I’m not trying to create agreement.
I’m trying to keep things from getting stuck.
I’m less interested in everyone agreeing
and more interested in what actually moves things forward.
I’m not sure Harmony is the right label for that.
It looks like it, sometimes.
But from the inside…
it feels more like deciding when something is worth stepping into—
and when it’s not.
